


Pinkological Figures

by loveluckylost



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Gen, Immortality, Mention of Death, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-06
Updated: 2019-07-06
Packaged: 2020-06-23 15:38:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19704376
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loveluckylost/pseuds/loveluckylost
Summary: Rhodonite is Lars’ voice of reason as some insecurities crop up during a night out with friends.





	Pinkological Figures

The evening was dark and overcast. A bit of a breeze rustled the canopy of the nearby trees and the canvas sail that stretched in a wide triangle from the building’s veranda to a pole on the other side of the concreted area, at the edge of the garden. The venue’s outdoor seating area was devoid of people except one lone figure who had excused himself from the rest of his party almost half an hour previously. This made finding him all the easier.

She guessed it was a little too chilly for normal humans to still be out here, despite the lit brazier and the ample lighting. He wasn’t seated at any of the tables but was instead slouched against a garden wall. He had a tumbler of whiskey in one hand that she knew he wasn’t drinking from - during occasions like the one he’d walked away from to be out here, he just liked to have something in his hands. Anything.

It’s much easier to pretend when you have a prop. It gives your hands something to do.

“Captain?” she asked with concern as she approached.

Lars, having not heard the door swing open, glanced up suddenly but looked relieved to see her.

“Hey Rhodonite,” he murmured as she settled against the wall beside him. “You weren’t _sent_ to find me, were you?”

“Oh, there were mumblings,” she admitted. “I decided on my own to go find you though.”

“I.. had to get away for a minute,” he muttered in explanation. “Stars, I _hate_ hanging out with those people.”

Rhodonite frowned. “Uh, Lars, you don’t mean-”

The look on his face told her that her fears might just be confirmed and she gasped, unwilling to believe it. “You HATE your friends!? Wh- h- why!?”

“What?! Of course not. _Well.._ No, not really,” he wrinkled his nose, unable to explain it. “They’re just.. I..”

Eyes wide, he realized something. “It has nothing to do with them. They’re great and I’m lucky to still have them in my life.” He furrowed his brow. “As usual, this is all to do with me and the garbage in my head.”

Rhodonite was still reeling in the flickering glow, still unable to believe what she was hearing. “Lars, I thought I asked you to clean up in there last week-”

“I did! It’s spotless! I meant garbage as in.. figuratively.”

She pointed a finger from one of her lower pair of arms up at him. “Well, _literally,_ it had better be spotless in there, or else!”

“Rhodonite - this isn’t about that.” He motioned over toward the building on the opposite side of the courtyard, inside which, he knew all their friends that made it to the function this evening were still being catered to by the near-worshipful staff. “You _know_ everyone else in there is at least thirty-five, right!? It’s..” he sunk a little. “They’re all way older than me.”

“..Oh, you mean biologically,” Rhodonite thought she could follow along, now. She had long since become familiar with the organic phenomenon of aging and nodded briefly. “Right, I’m with you now. Continue.”

“I guess they just remind me of how I died young? I caught sight of us all reflected in a window for a second as we were being ushered in, and I..” he hunched forward miserably. “I’m a _child_ compared to them.”

Rhodonite laughed lightly at his silliness. “But you’re not a human _child._ You’re-”

“H’yeah,” he interrupted, a sour look upon his features. “More like some dipshit teenager hanging out with some fully-formed emotionally-stable adults. I look like I could be the offspring of any one of them! I shouldn’t even be allowed inside there with them, much less allowed to order drinks. Even within my own cut, I’m an off color.”

“Uh, Captain, that’s.. your metaphor describes exactly what an off color is.”

He glared up at her briefly. “You know what I mean.” He softened again as he lowered his gaze back down to the attractive wooden decking below them.

“Lars. As Head of Strategic Operations, I have to ask - What are the facts here?”

After a moment, he sighed. “The one and only fact is that I’m.. jealous.”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Jealous? But.. don’t.. _can’t_ you see how lucky you are? You’re definitely the cutest one! And I knew them when they were all roughly your biological age - They all used to be _much_ cuter.”

“Yeeeeah..” he had to admit. “I guess they are all old and ugly now, while I’m still young and hot,” he smiled and laughed to himself. Then frowned. “That’s a liiie. They all look great! They filled out well! Life was good to every one of them!”

“Even Ronaldo,” she said.

“Even Ronaldo,” he sighed. “It’s like, I blinked and.. suddenly all my friends turned into these really well-rounded adults whereas I was always still just _bleh._ ”

“You and I both know that you are not whatever this ‘bleh’ is. Your friends don’t even think that way about you in the first place - You know that! Even if _you_ stopped aging as a teenager, it’s not like you stopped aging mentally. You all continued growing up together. Doesn’t that count for anything?”

He folded his free arm across his chest, his other hand hanging in front of him, still clasping the unsipped tumbler. For what purpose - he didn’t know anymore. He’d never had need of a prop around Rhodonite, or any of his crew. 

“Yeah, but.. what if I don’t want to think about it like that. What if I just want to mope and feel sorry for myself.”

She put two of her four arms around him. “Then I’ll just have to wear you down eventually. I have all the time in the cosmos for this silly game.”

She squeezed him until she saw it - small, reluctant, but nonetheless a smile - and reciprocated with her own as she relaxed her grip on him.

The breeze died down somewhat and the air was quiet, save for the sound of some nearby owl, and the muffled sounds of the din going on inside. They lapsed into a comfortable silence, savoring this lovely Earth evening for a long moment before Rhodonite spoke up again. 

Her voice was more quiet as she spoke now that the breeze was no longer a thing.

“But all _those_ issues should be rendered meaningless by now, right? Given the circumstances, I mean..” She shrugged and glanced away briefly before looking back at him - her four eyes focusing on his two, brow furrowed. 

Trying, but not really understanding, she continued. “Even though, yes, of course, you’re different - You’re also all the same. It’s not a matter of you ‘being’ eighteen.. or Ronaldo, for instance, ‘being’ thirty five anymore.”

Lars winced in the glow radiating from the nearby brazier, anticipating all too well the tidy parcel of logic that he knew was going to hit him.

“All of you are _thousands_ of years old.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

_Enjoy a Future!Lars and a Future!Rhodonite._

**Author's Note:**

> It’s a universe where Steven made more townies pink and they don’t age but everyone else had a decent stint at adulthood first. 
> 
> Also it’s some unknowable far future where they (and the gems) are considered living mythological figures by normie humans. Most of them, who don’t find it too painful, meet up to have a night out on Earth and (not really) eat and drink together every couple centuries or so.
> 
> (Clearly I’m just obsessed with the pink thing.)
> 
> (And I really really missed writing Rhodonite.)
> 
> I wrote this during some writer’s block I had with my other fic. I found it pretty helpful.
> 
> Any interest in more of this? I’m thinking of doing some occasional shorter pieces like this - focused more on character interactions rather than big space adventures like my other fic (which d/w I’m still working on it!).
> 
> Any suggestions for who made the cut into pinkness, at what age? I have my own ideas, but I'm interested in what you guys find interesting too.


End file.
